NO BUT REAL TALK OK I WENT TO SCHOOL IN GEORGIA AND I EVEN HAD TEACHERS TELLING ME THAT I SHOULDN’T CELEBRATE HALLOWEEN BECAUSE IT WAS THE DEVIL’S BIRTHDAY AND I GOT SUSPENDED FOR 4 DAYS BECAUSE I WROTE AN ESSAY ENTITLED “You’re All Dumb, The Devil Wasn’t Even Born: The Story of All Hallow’s Eve” AND I TALKED ABOUT THE HISTORY OF HALLOWEEN, HOW IT WAS A PAGAN CELEBRATION TO VENERATE AND APPEASE THE DEAD AND HOW THE DEVIL WAS TECHNICALLY AN ANGEL THAT WAS CAST FROM HEAVEN AND BECAUSE ANGELS WERE CREATED BY GOD THEY WEREN’T BORN THEREFORE THE DEVIL COULDN’T HAVE A BIRTHDAY. MY PRINCIPAL WAS SO CONCERNED FOR ME BECAUSE I WAS IN 3RD GRADE AND HE GOT MAD AT MY MOM FOR RAISING SUCH A “DISRESECTFUL, HEDOONISTIC CHILD”. SHE BOUGHT ME ICECREAM AND LET ME WATCH CARTOONS WHILE I WAS OUT OF SCHOOL.
Hey guys, I dont usually post stuff like this but I got a call from my mother earlier today about my dog Nero. Hes about 3 years old, and hes a big goofball, but a complete sweetheart, he wouldnt hurt a fly. But my reason for posting today is about a week ago while he was on his daily walk, he…
Orca whales are mean motherfuckers. They cruise the oceans with only two things in mind: one, having sex, and two, eating every poor fuck they find out there that’s smaller than them. They are such badass motherfuckers that even great white motherfucking sharks don’t dare fuck with them, which in my books, places them above the sperm whale as Biggest Badass of the Ocean. And why don’t sharks bother them, you may wonder? Because orcas fucking learned that if you flip a shark over they go into a sort of coma, so now they do it intentionally so they can eat the motherfucking sharks. Not only that, but orcas have also learned how to hunt sperm whales and motherfucking sea birds.
The orca whale lives in a matriarchal pod. Every pod has unique hunting methods and whatnot, which is passed down from parent to offspring- these scary fuckers have formed civilizations. And what do they do for fun, apart from hopping around on the water’s surface and grinning like crazy mofos? They hunt for fun, going so far as to tip over ice floes and beach themselves just for the thrill of killing.
Now, I know what you’re thinking. Orca whales are too damn cute and smiley looking to be heartless predators of the sea. Well, let me counter-argue with this photo:
THOSE ARE NOT THE TEETH OF A CREATURE THAT WANTS TO BE YOUR FRIEND.
